On the Upswing

During orientation we were showed a graph that displayed the typical cycle of "happiness" a person will go through during a year long immersion experience. At the time that I saw this graph, I was in my honeymoon stage of my year in Korea. I was loving everything from the sour cafeteria kimchi to practicing my few Korean phrases at coffee shops with my American friends. I had just landed in Korea and everything was wonderful.

I went through another honeymoon stage when I moved to Cheonan. My school was adorable and my homestay was great. I believed that I was living a charmed Korean life. The chart showed a slow decline from the honeymoon stage to the freak out stage, which was supposed to hit about October. This chart was exactly my experience. Around the beginning of the month, my rose colored glasses cleared up and I was seeing Korea for what it really is. Everything started to bother me from rude questions from strangers to getting sick from too much rice. I was becoming bored with teaching directly from a textbook and I was desperately looking for more to do during my free time. I started to realize that my clothes were going to become stretched out from being hung dry all year, that I was going to have to wake up everyday (including weekends) for an early morning family breakfast and that my host family would always treat me like I am 12 half of the time instead of 24, my Korean age. My host father and I got into our first big disagreement over me not wanting to confession in Korean. I didn't want to be at school because I found it frustrating to co-teach with someone I do not share many philosophies of education with and I didn't want to be at home because I didn't want to talk about how I have a unholy soul. My freak out stage put me into a funk.

The next step on the chart is recovery. I have finally reached this stage and with careful planning I have created solutions to each of my "issues." My host father and I sat down and discussed my spiritual health and I was sure to not let anything get lost in translation. We came to a consensus on my well being and everything at home is much more comfortable.

I spoke with my co-teacher about having more responsibilities at school to help my boredom and I am currently tutoring a group of students for a speech competition and another for a writing contest. The ability to work creatively with these students is really rewarding and helping to balance out the textbook boredom.

I have started volunteering at a North Korean refugee camp, The Heavenly Dream School, with some other ETAs. I am sure that this experience will be a highlight of my year and I am looking forward to sharing stories about the middle school class that I am teaching at the camp. The travel time to and from The Heavenly Dream School is a great time to catch up with other ETAs and speak in English.

For my mental and physical health I have started taking yoga classes at a local yoga center. The class is a small group of middle aged Korean women and myself. This was my first week, but they have done a great job of welcoming me into their group. We have great konglish conversations about breathing, their children, and of course, the swine flu. Today after class we had a tea party in the studio. We put our mats in a circle, drank green tea and ate cookies. It was really cute that they do that together. They also invited me out to dinner with the "ladies" next week for a traditional Korean meal. That pretty much means, there will be lots of food and lots of soju.

Overall, I am happy to be heading out of the recovery stage and into the plateau of happiness in Korea. I am almost a third of a way through my year. I have had a great experience so far, but I still have so far to go. There are lots of fun things coming up and I want to enjoy each of them to their full capacity :)

Less than two months until my family arrives in Korea!! Griswolds take Asia!

ETA Conference

This past weekend was the first ETA conference of the year. It was a four day extravaganza held in Gyongju, the first capital of Korea. The city itself was at one time the largest in East Asia, but most of it was destroyed during Japanese invasions and now it is home to about 300,00 people. I traveled with some of the other Cheonan ETAs by train to our destination on the southeast side of the country (we live in the northwest). Our ride was about four hours, but it was an exciting ride because at about every stop on the way at least one or two of our friends joined us on the train.

The whole group arrived at the Commodore Hotel and was greeted by Mrs. Shim, the director of Fulbright Korea. Our workshop included small group discussions about lesson plans, extracurricular activities, home stay issues and our overall experiences so far. We also had large group presentations from other ETAs about working with students outside of class, incorporating the arts into our ESL class and ideas for winter break.

The conference was a great opportunity to catch up with friends and discuss our experiences so far. I didn't realize how much I missed having extensive conversations in English or drinking at a bar filled with my friends. The conference allowed us to work and play. Following the workshop on Saturday some friends and I rented scooters and rode around town with a bunch of kids half of our age.

Throughout the weekend we were able to talk about some of the uncomfortable situations we have encountered and share many entertaining stories. It was really comforting to share stories and hear that the majority of my peers are having similar struggles as I am. Most of the stories either begin or end with the phrase, "only in Korea."

On Sunday, we traveled around Gyongju by bus from nine to five. We visited temples, ancient tombs and saw many traditional Korean artifacts. We learned that many of the sights and artifacts were replicates because the originals were destroyed by the Japanese. This was sad news, but we still tried our best to appreciate the artifacts for what they represented. Unfortunately for the person sitting next to me on the bus, I did not do well riding up and down the mountain on windy roads.

The conference concluded with a night full of storytelling and my first gin and tonic in Korea. Following a bike ride on Monday morning, we packed up our bags and headed back to the train station.

Chuseok: Part 2

After about two calm hours of reading and sleeping in the car we arrived at a stone cottage in a small village. The cottage was on a farm, built right next to a very old traditional Korean home. We were greeted at the car by one of Elijah's nieces and a family friend from China.

Serena, the friend from China was my age and spoke English. Before stepping inside the house, I knew this would be a completely different Chuseok experience.

When I entered Elijah's mother's home I was greeted by about eight visiting relatives. One of the aunts spoke some English and was very welcoming. Elijah's mother was adorable. She sort of looked like a Korean version of my Grandma Jeanne. She was short, always smiling and had the same short curly hair. Within a few minutes we were seated around a table on the floor sharing fruit and catching up (or for me, answering the initial questions: age, boyfriend, why Korea?).

After only being in the house for a few minutes I was told to go take a shower. I was happy to comply with this request and enjoyed being able to clean up and put on warm comfortable clothes. Everyone else in my immediate family also showered and we spent the rest of the night lounging in our sweats. I took an evening stroll around the village with some of the cousins, enjoyed a wonderful meal and participated in drinking some "healthy alcohol" with the adults. The healthy part comes from the fact that there are fifteen oriental medicines in this alcoholic drink. It wasn't the best thing I have ever had, but it also wasn't the worst (Dayton memories!).

I slept in an attic room with the other girl cousins and felt like I was at a middle school sleepover. In the morning I woke up to the smell of breakfast (maybe I am starting to like eating kimchi for breakfast??). We went on another nice walk around the house and all ate our meal together before the other family members would leave and head back to their homes.

My immediate family and I stayed for a few hours and explored Elijah's mother's land and some surrounding areas. We dug up yams and hiked up a small mountain to a temple that was built to honor a Korean general that stood up to protect his people during many of the invasions of Korea. As we walked, we talked about returning after the first snow fall and picked out where we would build our snowmen and what hills we would sled down. Later in the afternoon we said our goodbyes and returned to Cheonan. I am looking forward to another visit this winter.

Chuseok: Part 1

This past weekend was one of my most eventful yet. Chuseok, the Korean harvest celebration, was on Saturday and my family and I celebrated it by traveling to my host father and mother's hometowns. The week preceding the Chuseok celebration I was informed many times that it would be an uncomfortable situation for me, but I tried very hard to have a positive outlook and not prejudge the situation. We left after breakfast on Friday and headed to our first stop, Nonsan, my host father's hometown. After a two hour car ride of my host brother jumping around the back seat with his gun (seat belts are not common in the backseats of cars in Korea) we arrived at my host grandparents home.

Mark was not exaggerating that he grew up on dirt floors. Their house was a very rural and traditional Korean home. Halabaje (grandfather) and halmonie (grandmother) moved to the house that we visited after their kids were grown. It is down the street from their original house and the floors were covered. As soon as we arrived all members of my family went into the bedroom and changed their clothes into more comfortable "country" clothes. Elijah stepped into the kitchen to start cooking lunch and did not leave for almost the entire time that we were visiting. Many members of Marks family arrived and I was introduced to brothers, sisters, nieces and nephews. There was not much translating and therefore if I did not speak Korean, very little was said to me.

For lunch we had pigs feet. I had heard that Koreans like to enjoy pigs feet and was secretly praying that I would never encounter a situation when I would have to "enjoy" them also. Coming to Korea as a person that does not eat red meat and introducing many different kinds of meat into my diet was a personal challenge that I have overcome. The pigs feet made me feel like I was on the television show Fear Factor. Elijah was at the end of the table pointing at her face trying to tell me that I need to eat lots of pigs feet because they are good for your skin. (I looked it up online and studies show that pigs feet are a superfood- great for skin!) The gooey texture of the feet was the most difficult part for me to deal with. The feet were boiled and put in a soup with ginseng root. The broth of the soup was very good, but I needed to force every bite of the foot down. You know that something is difficult to eat when you are washing it down with big bites of super spicy kimchi and gulps of lukewarm corn water. But I did it with a smile.

After lunch I went to a rice mill with Heewon and Mark for the first step of our songpyeon (a traditional Chusoek food) adventure. I will profile that process in another post. My day was filled with lots of songpyeon, random Konglish conversations and children running away from me in fear because I am a foreigner. It also included my host father telling me that I should not read because it will make me bored (despite the fact that I assured him many times that I am reading a great book), my host mother asking me over and over in Korean if I am bored, yet denying any attempt I made to help her in the kitchen and the children running around shooting BB guns outside.

As a foreign female in her twenties, I am in a tough situation with my role in the family. I am not Korean and do not speak Korean, so cooking like a woman my age would is out of question. I am not a child, so I do not spend too much time with the children. I am sometimes sent to spend time with the men, while the women cook, but I do not smoke cigarettes, so I tried to avoid some to those situations also. Thank goodness for books. I make judgment calls all day long about when is a good time to be a cultural ambassador and when is a good time to take a step back and let everyone be. I don't think that there is a role for foreigners, so I am trying very hard to create my own place. So far I am learning that it is best to buy children ice cream, go for walks with the men and children after dinner and offer a thousand times to help cook. I was given one task- to peel the shells off of a hundred quail eggs.

I was told at dinner that I would be sleeping in the "wife room." Mark's parent's house had only four rooms, the kitchen, one extra bedroom/tv room, their bedroom, and the main room where the fridge and kimchi freezer are. Tables were set up on the floor in this room for all meals. As I sat on the floor in the main room I wondered where the "wife room" would be. I ended up sleeping in the grandparents room on a mat with my host mother and next to her sister-in-law and child. The children and their dads slept in the main room and the grandparents slept in the extra room. I fell asleep to a woman breastfeeding beside me and woke up to my host father telling me to go wash my face and go put on make-up.

After breakfast the men changed into suites and so I went and changed into a skirt and tights. I was startled when I came out of the room and the women were all yelling at me in Korean to go change. I had to wear my clothes from Friday for a second day, despite my hike in them the previous day, and had no idea why. Just as I sat down to read a little I was told to grab my camera and come outside. I was put in a car and told that we were going to the mountain. "The mountain" is a very loose term considering 70% of Korea is covered in mountains.

I learned on our drive that we were going to visit the tombs of my host great-grandparents. Only the men, children and women that were not cooking attending this outing. When we arrived at the mountain, we hiked up to two tombs, and I noticed that my host uncle was carrying a box. I thought that maybe there were flowers in the box? Next to the tomb, a mat was unrolled, and the box was unloaded. Of course, food and soju! It was 10:00am and we had just finished breakfast. The food was set out and the family prayed together, a Hail Mary and an Our Father, followed by a bow to the ground. Then, grandfather poured a cup of soju on each of the graves! We all sat down and enjoyed the food together. Just when I think that I cannot eat anymore, they come out with more and more food.

We stayed at that grave for about twenty minutes and then we headed on to the next. We said the same prayers, but did not eat at the second sight. Third, we were onto a "water grave." After a quick stop for some ice cream, we arrived at the lake where some of the family members ashes had been spread. The ritual was performed and we were onto our next stop. At the next site, great grandfather's brother, Heewon found a four leaf clover. The next stop, another brother, was behind a farm. This was not like any typical farm. This was a pig farm where dogs were raised on the side and sold to restaurants. I know they eat dog in Korea, but another hope of mine was that I would never have to actually see the dogs that they eat. Tons of puppies and big dogs all caged together next to piles to trash, animal cruelty at its best. The dog farm was our last stop and we returned home for lunch. At lunch the soup was so spicy that tears rolled down my cheeks. After at least trying it a few times and the physical sign of tears that it was too hot, I was excused from eating it.

After lunch we departed for Hongsam, my host mother's hometown.

Driving in Korea!

Today has been an ILK (I love Korea) kind of day. I have the day off of school for Chuseok, the Korean harvest festival. My family and I will be leaving for my host grandparents house tomorrow and spent today getting ready for the festivities. Chuseok is the holiday when many Koreans exchange gifts the way many Americans do at Christmas. This week at school I got a really nice set of tea cups from my vice principal. My principal gave me a HUGE box of shampoo, conditioner, body wash, four bars of soap, a poof, and four tubes of green tea toothpaste. Young gave me a box of 200 individually wrapped orange flavored rice puffs. I also received a box set of wool socks from another teacher at school.

I woke up this morning and at breakfast I asked if there was anything that I could do to help prepare for Chuseok this weekend. I thought that maybe I could help Elijah cook or make a trip to the supermarket to pick up some treats for the kids. My offer was received with a great smile from Mark and he said that it would be a great help if I would drive Elijah around to drop of presents to her friends for Chuseok and take her and Heewon to Emart. I was unaware that my host mother did not drive, but Mark knew that I have an international drivers license and this plan was perfect. The driving laws in Korea are all the same at home, but Koreans follow the laws only about 50% of the time. Needless to say I was pretty nervous about driving around and being directed in only Korean, because my host mother does not speak English.

Everything turned out OK and I was very thankful that I have studied so hard in Korean. We laughed a lot about how easily we communicated and how scared Elijah got when I would pull of behind cars and not break as quickly as she would have liked. We were a team; Elijah read the Korean signs and abbreviated them into short Korean phrases that I was familiar with. It had been a long time since I had driven a car at all and years since I had driven such a boat of a car. Thank goodness for my practice driving Poppa's cars years ago.

We drove to Emart and browsed isles of box gifts sets for Chuseok. The sets included matching couple socks, spam (slogan: Spam makes you smile), vitamins and every type of body lotion and wash you could imagine. I hung out in the aisles with dried squid while she ran around in the masses of people picking up various ingredients for our weekend. Based on our shopping trip, I am both excited and nervous about what I might be putting into my mouth this weekend. I am also looking forward to seeing all of the gifts exchanged, because they are not things that I would ever dream of exchanging with such pride.

I think that this will be an "only in Korea" weekend!

Playing Catch-up

I have a bit of blogging to catch up with after my two weeks without a computer. This past weekend I made a trip up to Seoul and purchased a new computer. Macintosh is not very popular in Korea and there are no Mac stores, only authorized dealers. But in typical Korean fashion I was able to negotiate the price down a bit by paying for my computer in cash. The deal made the computer a better deal than I thought it would be and like a cherry on top, the nice computer guys threw in a free case and mouse. I was not very happy to be spending such a large sum of money this early in my year, but having a computer with Hangul (korean alphabet) keys is pretty cool.

My weekend in Seoul was a much needed break and was a great time to hang out with some fellow expats. My friend Aaron has a friend in Seoul that works for GM-Daewoo and showed us around his life in Seoul. We stayed at his house in the UN village, met the local tailor that makes custom suites for all of the guys at GM and lunched at the Seoul Club. The best part o

f my weekend was relaxing at a western style home, eating pesto, drinking great Italian wine and playing Nintendo Wii.

I have always known that I would reach a time in Korea when the honeymoon stage would end and I would start to realize that this is my life right now. This weekend is the three month mark for my time in Korea. I have already been here for a quarter of a year! I have learned so much and have had so many experiences.

I am also well aware at this point that many of my experiences this year might not be positive. During my honeymoon phase in Korea, I was a warmly welcomed guest. I am transitioning from my Korean vacation to the phase of living a typical korean life, but as an outsider. In most ways this has been a good thing. I am now allowed to help with the dishes and take care of more things on my own. Unfortunately, without the language skills that could take years to attain, I will never be completely independent in Korea. That realization is a difficult one to come to peace with.

Today I found a wonderful little coffee shop called the Book Cafe within walking distance of my house. With coffee by my side, things are looking up. I am confident that I will improve my language skills and that I will begin to embrace my Korean life as an outsider. This next week I will be begin planning my family's trip to Korea for Christmas and make plans for my winter break. Just thinking about the possibilities (Thailand, Indonesia..) is making me antsy about starting to plan.

Tonight: Watching The Office on DVD!

Computer Upsaio

Upsaio is a Korean word that means missing or something is not working. For example when I can't find my phone, I have to tell my host mother that my phone is upsaio, and she understands that I am looking for it. If we do not have any more paper towels in the kitchen, I will say that the tissues are upsaio. Right now my computer is UPSAIO. My faithful friend that got me through college an helped me to complete my thesis has finally gone to her final resting place. My computer has crashed and I am currently working to recover my data and research the best options I have to buy a new one. I am sharing this because I do not have much computer time and therefore I have not posted any blogs this week. : (

Last weekend I visited a local museum and had the opportunity to dress up in traditional Korean clothing. The pictures are still on my camera because of my computer crash, but I will post them asap. My family also took me to a food expo in Cheonan. It was called the Well Being Expo and I was put into a foreigner line and had my temperature taken so that I would not "contaminate" the festival.

This week has been filled with many random little occurrences, such as seeing my first English movie. Last night my host father had an impromptu party at our house and two of my American friends attended. We ate lobster soup, spoken Konglish and enjoy some drinks together. It was a wonderful opportunity for my host family to meet some of my friends and for my friends to get to know my family.

I will post more when I get my new computer up and running.

: )